This article is for anyone that does, or is currently doing, the WORRY thing.
It’s a story about what I recently did (about 30 mins before writing) to break the dam of worry that had been looming over me for days.
If you read last weeks post, I spoke about getting triggered putting up ‘For Sale’ signs around my neighborhood, as we are in the process of selling our house in Bali (while doing a build at the same time).
So I am juggling a few balls in the air.
Which I am sure that you can relate to.
I am 100% sure.
Rarely have we got all of our ducks lined up so we can kick back with our feet up, and be in blissful rapture.
The price of wanting to live an extraordinary life is there will be a bit of resistance, disruption, set-back and frustration.
It’s the ticket price to play life at the next level.
So I know that you know what I am talking about.
Life can get pretty overwhelming at times.
And then we can do this worry thing.
Which I like to thank my mum for teaching me.
She taught me well.
Just joking mum!!
(Sort of).
So that takes me to one of my main points of today’s ‘lessons’.
Drum roll please maestro…
Worry Dam Busting Tool #1
This was the first and main thing that busted my dam of worry.
Which had been lingering for days, and perhaps even weeks.
It was getting back my SENSE OF HUMOUR.
Laughing in the face of adversity.
Seeing myself from the outside looking in and reminding myself to LIGHTEN THE (BEEP) UP!
When we view things with a sense of humour and see the funny (or crazy) side of them, we tend to shift our energy into something lighter and brighter.
Which also happens to be the IDEAL STATE to figure shit out.
Worry does not equal good solutions.
Worry makes us dumber.
Laughter, joy, happiness, and lightness of spirit, allows us to tap back into our creative genius.
You can either find the funny side yourself, or contact your funniest friend, colleague or family member. I have a cousin (Mic) who is an absolute hoot, and she can always get me out of my inner pity party by making fun of me and my circumstances.
The other thing that helps with this process, is the next tool.
Worry Dam Busting Tool #2
It’s called PERSPECTIVE.
It’s extremely useful as it allows you to see a different picture (closer to reality), which allows you to lighten up and not only find your sense of humour, but to help you find creative solutions.
When we get perspective, we see things differently.
In fact, in order to get perspective, we need to position ourselves ABOVE our own little drama.
We need to see things from a higher place.
The whole picture.
In context.
And for me – living in Asia – that is pretty easy to do.
When I think I have issues (aka: first world issues), I jump on my scooter (which itself is something many can’t afford) and take a look around at people doing life a lot tougher than me.
It is the same as tipping a cold bucket of water on my head.
(This is why cold water ‘therapy’ is not only therapy for the immune system – among others – but therapy for the mind, as it gets you out of the mind and into the present moment, where you are wondering if your testicles will survive the torture they are receiving).
If you have read my work before, you know my favourite perspective getting question.
“What’s the Reality?”
This question works a treat.
It is also the springboard to help you come up with creative solutions based on FACTS and not your story or drama
(Smaller) Worry Dam Busting Tools
Here are some other tools you might like to use or carry in your Worry Dam Busting Toolkit, which are designed to change your emotional state into something lighter and more elevated:
- Spending time in nature.
- Playing with a dog (they seem to have no worries and a focus on playing, not worrying).
- Eating a tub of ice-cream (JUST JOKING!! Bad idea, as you come down off the sugar high).
- Listening to elevated music.
- Watching or listening to your favourite comedian.
NOTE:
The Tools are designed to help you change your ‘state’, not to be things to hide within. Sometimes I might overdo it on the massages here in Bali, to distract myself from unpleasant thoughts. But that is only good if I use that as a tool to change my state, as opposed to a place to hide. At some point we might need to ‘face the music’. Our aim is to be in the most elevated emotional state for the figuring things out phase. Hiding often will not speed up, or lead to a great outcome.
The Main Point
One of the best tools for getting off the worry merry-go-round is a SENSE OF HUMOUR, which is often arrived at, or supported by, bringing your life and circumstances into (factual) PERSPECTIVE (as opposed to be immersed in stories, assumptions and drama).
My Parting words
A friend recently asked me where I get my ‘material’ in order to write each week.
A lot is from my clients.
But there is also a bunch that comes from my own life, as I try to figure shit out myself.
Like you, I am a work in progress.
Sometimes I slip into the worry habit and get myself into a pickle.
The aim – of this work – is to ensure we don’t stay in the pickle for too long and start to ferment.
It’s all about the speed of recovery.
Just like in physical fitness.
We want to get back to enjoying life as quickly as possible, after we are ‘thrown’ off course.
How is your ball juggling going?
And are you maintaining a sense of humour through it all?
It’s not desirable, but ESSENTIAL.
See the funniness of the day as it unfolds, and let your week be a little lighter and more whacky please.
See you next week.
Take care,
Carl
