Hello again.
Did you know that I have been writing a newsletter and ‘Tips’ since 2005? That is a LOT of Tips and sometimes I get myself into a wee tail-spin trying to figure out the best way to serve you. I generally ask myself “What is the most relevant and impactful thing I can share with you today?” and then trust that the most useful stuff will bubble to the surface.
This is what bubbled up today…
TIP 1: What’s the rush?
My girlfriend Ferry will often say to me when I am intensely walking somewhere or riding my scooter faster than I need to, “Do you have another appointment that you need to be at?”
And unfortunately, the answer is often “No”. I was just being intense, or impatient, or rushing because I thought I had to, or rushing because I went unconscious and forgot that I am going to live to 105 years of age, so seriously, “What is the rush?!?”
There is a saying that we overestimate what we can do in 1 year and underestimate what we can achieve in 5 years.
What I find is the typical outcome of trying to do too much in too short a time is that I get stressed out. Yes it is great to be able to put your hand up in the air as another high achiever and get the applause of an adoring crowd, but at what expense?
Don’t get me wrong. I like getting stuff done. And I like getting big stuff done. But as I have got older and wiser (as measured by the Carl Massy Wisdom Test :)), I do realise that it is totally ok, and in a lot of cases HIGHLY BENEFICIAL to do the following:
1. Expand the timeline on my goals.
2. Put some goals in the recycle bin.
3. Put some goals on the shelf to be reviewed next year (and probably put in the recycle bin then ;-)).
I want to have more fun. And I want YOU to have more fun too. Sound like a good idea?
So next time you are ‘rushing’ towards some virtual finish line, ask yourself if it is essential that you get there as fast as possible. Or is it actually ok that you take a more leisurely scenic route, that might be more enjoyable and a whole lot less stressful.
Life is to be enjoyed and you have been granted ‘free will’ and control of the steering wheel.
You have the con … Captain!
TIP 2: Create some space
This sort of ties in with Tip 1.
How good would you say you are at filling in all the spaces in your day and life with ‘things to do’? I am going out on a limb here, but I am going to hypothesize and suggest that you might be one of ‘those people’ (like me) that likes to stay busy, or finds it hard to feel good about yourself if you are not achieving something.
So here is something for you to try.
Create some space for creative imagineering (which is fully endorsed by Einstein and Walt Disney). When I say create some space, I actually mean get your calendar out and block out 2hrs on one day each week to do some creative imagineering. Get off that hamster wheel for 2hrs and see how it changes your life for the better.
Find somewhere nice, make yourself comfortable, have a cup of your favourite relaxing drink handy, take 5 deep cleansing breath’s, then curiously ponder these questions:
- What in my life is good or great at the moment?
- If I zoom out 3-5 years, what would my ideal life look like?
- What am I focusing my energy on at the moment?
- Is what I am focusing my energy on taking me closer to my ideal?
- What could I focus on or do differently to take me towards my ideal?
- What could I do more of (or less of) to bring more joy and fulfilment into my life?
Then take action (after your allocated 2hrs) based on what you have discovered.
Don’t wait until you are just short of your ‘destination’ (or have arrived) to realise that this was really not where you wanted to be after all. Damn it!! I wanted London (England), not London (Kentucky, USA)! Bollocks! Bollocks!! Bollocks!!!!
In my humble opinion, it’s much better to change your direction (and destination) and experience some disruption, then it is to arrive at a place that you don’t really want to be. Just saying…
Yep. You get it.
TIP 3: Ask for help
I see a lot of businesses in Bali come and go. Every week there will be a new business that is shutting their doors. It is a shame to see and I feel for the person that may be pulling the shutters down on their dreams.
But I have a sneaking suspicion that they may be guilty of the following:
- Not asking for (competent) help.
- Asking for help way too late (after the horse has well and truly bolted).
Please don’t let that be you. You don’t have to figure it all out yourself. You don’t have to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders alone. You don’t have to carry that burden. You don’t have to prove you are super-human. You don’t have to know all the answers to be worthy of love and respect.
This year, if you need a hand, PROUDLY ask for help and you might just be surprised to find out that they LOVED that you have asked and are more than ready, willing and able to help out.
Let’s do this thing called life together.
Let’s hold hands and skip along with our hearts overflowing with joy (or the equivalent version if you are a dudes dude and don’t friggin skip or hold hands!!!
And finally…
Keep having FUN!!
Wishing you all the very best for 2017.
Cheers
Carl
PS: Honoured to be there and proud to serve! 🙂 🙂 🙂