Category: Decision Making

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consciousness Decision Making Growth Life Lessons Overwhelm Perspective Stress Success

Mental Pushing And Pulling – Thanks To Our Biology

Where to start?

How about with the name of the book I just finished reading, which shared pretty interesting insights. The book was called: ‘Why You’re Unhappy’ by Loretta Graziano Breuning, PhD.

I didn’t agree with everything she presented, but because she has a background in anthropology as well as psychology, it brought a nice perspective to her discussion on biology.

And the influence on our feelings and behaviours.

She spoke a lot about the individual roles of dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, endorphins and cortisol; and how they are primarily used for survival (and reproduction of genes), as with all mammals.

I have talked before about the ‘mid’ brain, also called the limbic brain or mammalian brain.

It has a number of functions including regulation and generation of our emotions, which obviously affects us moment-to-moment and day-to-day.

I found a few things in this book especially fascinating.

Particularly the author’s overarching message.

We are not – biologically – designed to be ‘happy’ all the time.

It is not only okay, but “normal” to feel our emotions go up and go down throughout our day and life in general.

I think that is a great point.

If we EXPECT to be happy, all the time, or think there is something “wrong” with us if we aren’t, then we may be fighting reality.

What I also found fascinating was…

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Choice Decision Making Perspective Success

The Bigger The ‘Gap’, The Bigger The Frustration & Disappointment

Let’s jump straight in.

Have you ever heard the following statement or philosophy?

The size of the GAP between the REALITY and your EXPECTATIONS, determines the amount of discomfort (frustration, anger, disappointment, etc.) you will experience.

As shown in my diagram further down.

Small GAP = small discomfort.

BIG GAP = BIG (emotional) PAIN. So today I want to look at the biggest EXPECTATION Boo-Boo’s (aka: mistakes) many people erroneously make.

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Choice Decision Making Goal Setting Tips Success

Which Is More Important For Success: The Right Goal Or The Right Process?

The other day I was in a funky local cafe.

And part of their cool vibe was having paperback books you could read while hanging out there.

I spotted one of my fave books so I picked it up and flipped it open.

It was Atomic Habits by James Clear (and exceptionally great book).

I started reading the section that I had randomly flicked it open to and started to chuckle to myself.

I LOVE synchronicity and coincidence (which I consider means my alignment is good). 

The reason I chuckled is because I was reading a book on my Kindle earlier in the day by Scott Adams (the creator of the Dilbert comic strips), and he not only mentioned the same thing, but referenced back to James Clear and Atomic Habits as another person that agrees with this concept.

Therefore, I took that as a nudge that I need to share their insights and observations with you.

So here we go.

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Choice Decision Making Emotional Goal Setting Tips Overwhelm Success

The 1, 2, 3 to Getting More Clarity

The title may be a little misleading.

I was actually not thinking of step 1, step 2, and step 3.

But rather, Level 1, Level 2 and Level 3, when it comes to getting more CLARITY.

And in this case, the levels also refer to the size of the ‘problem’ or issues, or the size of the consequences of the decisions you have to make.

Let’s think of it like this:

Level 1 – A problem or decision to solve or figure out, but that is not too big or high in consequences.

Level 2 – The problem or decisions is a bigger, or more complex, and has more consequences if you “F” it up.

Level 3 – This is where the decisions you are making are complex, there numerous overlapping parts, and possibly a shortage of resources, so you need to be extra creative, plus the consequences of “F’ing it up” are pretty high (and potentially a huge pain in the butt and maybe even a potential financial loss).

So I see that these three levels of “challenge” require three different ENVIRONMENTS to enhance the probability of me solving it to the best of my ability.

I also like to use the metaphor of ‘stepping back’.

Level 1 = small step back.

Level 2 = medium size step backwards.

Level 3 = a big step backwards to allow the greatest level of perspective.

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Choice Decision Making Emotional Overwhelm Problem

An Awesome Problem-Solving Tool

Firstly, the ESP is not (exactly) extra sensory perception, though perhaps there is some of that still going on.

Secondly, it is thanks to a client conversation the other day for the creation of this tool.

Or more, the synthesizing of a few different tools into one.

The idea came after seeing the usual pattern when we have a PROBLEM show up in our lives.

The usual flow looks like this:

Problem > Trigger > REACTION > Emotional Explosion (big or small) > Trying to solve problem > OUTCOME

One of the major downsides of this is the OUTCOME.

Which is actually the most important bit.

Usually the outcome – using this pathway – is that it “might” be okay in the short-term, but is very unlikely to be useful or appropriate over the long-term.

The reason is that when we are in a survival emotional state (which this sets up), we have limited access to the frontal cortex of our brain, which is where we ENVISION (realistic) future consequences of our choices.

We are in short-term survival mode.

Not ‘making-choices-to-shape-your-greatest-destiny’ mode.

So we need to INTERRUPT the pattern.

This is where our ESP Tool comes in.

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Choice consciousness Decision Making Growth Optimum Health Success

Decision Making Mastery, Destiny, Convenience & Optimization

I have a sneaking suspicion you know where this is going.

And before we go there.

I want you to know this.

I care about you.

I want the very best for you.

I write because I love learning, teaching and sharing, but I also LOVE to help people have more joy, fun and happiness in their lives.

That’s pretty much my job.

Whether I am writing, presenting to an audience or coaching.

I want people to express their full potential in a way that is unique to them.

So, with that said, let’s see if we can get to where I want to take us.

When I was growing up in a country town in Australia, I would watch a show called ‘Playschool’.

And one of the tunes I can still hear in my head, 40+ years later is something like this…

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consciousness Decision Making Life Lessons Overwhelm Perspective

How to Stay Up-to-date Globally Without Losing Your Mind

The other day I was in conversation with friends, and we were talking about ‘world affairs’.

But the most interesting part of that conversation – for me – is how do we stay informed, without being consumed by a whole bunch of ‘bad news’?

And what do we mean being informed?

Is it informed for interest sake?

Is it informed, so we can make informed decisions in our own lives?

Is it informed so we can sound like we know what’s going on in the world to impress our friends?

And how informed do we need to be?

Lots of questions, and playing around in them can make your head spin.

So in this article I want to give you my thoughts and perspective on how to stay informed, to what level, and in a way that is beneficial for you and your lifestyle generation, plus in a way that you don’t lose your sanity, or sense of life being something precious.

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Choice Decision Making Growth Life Purpose Success

When Would Now Be A Great Time To Check In On What ‘Is’ Working And What ‘Is Not’

Yep.

It is check-in time.

And what a great time of the year to be doing it.

When you make a course correction at the start of the year, it can mean you are in an entirely new place, space and version of yourself, by the end of the year.

High ROI!!

Apparently prior preparation and planning prevents piss-poor performance, so let’s see if we can take some relatively easy steps NOW, to create an even better experience over the course of this year.

The area we are going to target is “HABITS“.

And what better way to start off this inner reflection, than with a quote by James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits.

“New goals don’t deliver new results. New lifestyles do. And a lifestyle is a process, not an outcome. For this reason, all of your energy should go into building better HABITS, not chasing better results.”

He’s talking my lingo.

The importance of creating a ‘lifestyle’, and that lifestyle being created, and greatly influenced by, the HABITS we adopt in our lives.

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Choice Decision Making Meditation Nutrition Optimum Health Perspective Physical Activity Success

Want More Energy? Then Target These 2 Things

I believe one of my principle ‘reasons for being’ on the planet is to help others.

And the thing I think most helps others is them having more ENERGY.

If we have more energy, then we have more capacity to do awesome stuff.

And to create awesome stuff.

And to be awesome human beings.

So I am fascinated with, and seriously committed to figuring out: HOW CAN WE HAVE (EVEN) MORE ENERGY?

Plus how can we best use it once we have powered up.

Today I will focus on the generation of energy, and then in another article I will talk about the (best) utilization of our energy.

There are 2 principle ways to have the most energy, as I see it.

  1. Generate more.
  2. Waste less.

Let’s start with the first.

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Choice consciousness Decision Making Feeling Life Lessons Perspective

Tough Decisions, Complexity, Better Questions and Cute Dogs

Yes; we will be discussing all of those topics.

As they weave together.

Regardless of whether you are a ‘dog person’ or not, I am sure you will get where I am coming from, and take something of value from this conversation.

Over the last bunch of weeks I have had some really tough decisions to make in relationship to dogs, which have not been easy.

Time to really practice what I teach.

All of which I have written about over this year and are in my latest book (18 Ways We Make Life Way Harder Than It Needs To Be) and YES, that is a ridiculously blatant plug for my new book, but I am okay with that as I know it will serve you well.

Now let’s jump straight into the life of Carl Massy story time…

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