Category: Perspective

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Choice Goal Setting Tips Growth Perspective

Meaningful Goals and Happiness

I am writing this in December, as we come towards the end of the year.

Staring down the barrel of 2024.

December is definitely a time to reflect on the year coming to a close.

Plus is a time to curiously contemplate what your Goals for 2024 might be.

I was talking with a client the other day about the degree of global disruption there is currently; economically, politically and with numerous wars/major conflicts (something like 20 worldwide).

All of these things, shocking as they are, pull our attention, energy and emotions towards them.

In metaphysical terms, and even in quantum physics, it is clear that where attention goes, energy flows.

So one of our greatest challenges is where we put our attention.

What are we creating in our life, as a result of where we are placing our attention?

Are we creating the future we wish to experience?

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Acceptance consciousness Emotional Growth Perspective

Struggling to Find Acceptance? Here’s a Solution.

WHEN YOU ARE STRUGGLING TO FIND “ACCEPTANCE”, HERE’S WHAT TO DO

I think we all realise that it is more spiritual, saintly or virtuous, to be able to ACCEPT that which is.

There is also a difference between knowing this ‘principle’ and actually trying to apply it to real life.

Especially when life can be pretty horrendous at times.

Or people can be so ‘bad’ at times.

We are forever hearing of terrible things (personally or collectively), and the idea of Acceptance (of these horrible things) is a pretty bitter pill to swallow.

Again, we might know that Acceptance is a higher path, but boy oh boy can it be friggin hard to get to at times!

And again there is a difference between telling ourselves we have accepted something in our lives, and ACTUALLY accepting it all the way down into our bones.

When we intellectually accept things (“Yes, I accept X”), often our emotions and behaviours just don’t get the ‘Memo’.

So…

What to do?

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Choice Decision Making Meditation Nutrition Optimum Health Perspective Physical Activity Success

Want More Energy? Then Target These 2 Things

I believe one of my principle ‘reasons for being’ on the planet is to help others.

And the thing I think most helps others is them having more ENERGY.

If we have more energy, then we have more capacity to do awesome stuff.

And to create awesome stuff.

And to be awesome human beings.

So I am fascinated with, and seriously committed to figuring out: HOW CAN WE HAVE (EVEN) MORE ENERGY?

Plus how can we best use it once we have powered up.

Today I will focus on the generation of energy, and then in another article I will talk about the (best) utilization of our energy.

There are 2 principle ways to have the most energy, as I see it.

  1. Generate more.
  2. Waste less.

Let’s start with the first.

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consciousness Fear Feeling Growth Negative Emotions Perspective

When Pride is Not A Good Thing

Extract from 18 Ways We Make Life Way Harder Than It Needs To Be by Carl Massy (WAY 16)

“Pride costs us more than hunger, thirst, and cold.”

Thomas Jefferson (US President and primary Author of US Declaration of Independence)

I think most of us were taught that ‘pride’ is a good thing. To feel proud for who and what we are. To take pride in what we do. To take pride in what we have achieved – be it over the course of our lives or over the last few weeks working on a new project at work, which we totally nailed!

So yes, pride can be a good thing. But like many things, there can be another side to it, when taken to extreme. It is like all great virtues. They are great when they are applied in a conscious self-aware way. Too much bravery and someone can become reckless. Too much loyalty and someone can be taken advantage of or stuck in something for longer than is healthy. Too much single-mindedness and someone can meander down the wrong path. Too much flexibility and someone can be all over the place.

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Choice consciousness Decision Making Feeling Life Lessons Perspective

Tough Decisions, Complexity, Better Questions and Cute Dogs

Yes; we will be discussing all of those topics.

As they weave together.

Regardless of whether you are a ‘dog person’ or not, I am sure you will get where I am coming from, and take something of value from this conversation.

Over the last bunch of weeks I have had some really tough decisions to make in relationship to dogs, which have not been easy.

Time to really practice what I teach.

All of which I have written about over this year and are in my latest book (18 Ways We Make Life Way Harder Than It Needs To Be) and YES, that is a ridiculously blatant plug for my new book, but I am okay with that as I know it will serve you well.

Now let’s jump straight into the life of Carl Massy story time…

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Choice Perspective Relationship

Handy Relationship Tip: When Not to “Wing’ It

Relationships have a pretty big impact on the quality of our lives.

I suspect you might agree with me on that one.

And a relationship, which is healthy and harmonious, is a beautiful soothing balm for our mental health.

It seems when the relationships in our lives are going well, life is SO much easier.

Alternatively, when they are a bit wobbly, life can sort of suck.

One of my favourite strategies still remains knowing The 5 Love Languages and APPLYING the strategy in your relationships, but I want to share another with you.

This was reiterated with me the other day in a coaching session.

My client is great at dealing with stuff in his professional life, but a bit wobbly at times when it comes to relationships (aren’t we all).

And in this case, there is a good reason why…

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Choice Decision Making Emotional Growth Optimum Health Perspective

A 19th Way We Make Life WAY Harder

Today we are going to talk about fuel.

Fuel for you, so you get stuff done; the stuff which is best for you in the short and long term, and that contributes to the quality and enjoyment of your life.

We are going to talk about the fuel source called WILLPOWER.

We make life a lot harder when we don’t understand the limitations of willpower.

And what might be a better (less HARD inducing) choice.

Here is the thing.

And where it gets a bit paradoxical.

We may need to use willpower in order to get to the place where we can use another more effective and efficient fuel source.

That fuel source is HABIT.

Well habit isn’t actually a source of fuel, it is more a system which is more efficient in its energy consumption.

Willpower burns fuel (energy) quickly.

Habit burns fuel (energy) more efficiently.

So if you utilize HABIT more, and WILLPOWER less, you will have MORE ENERGY available to direct into your life desires, or have more redundancy for life’s inevitable curve balls.

Essentially life is WAY harder if we don’t have any energy left over for the unplanned, unforeseen and unexpected

Bugger!

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Choice Doubt Emotional Feeling Negative Emotions Overwhelm Perspective

How to Deal with Overwhelm

ANOTHER EFFECTIVE WAY TO DEAL WITH GREATER LEVELS OF OVERWHELM.

In the past I have spoken about different ways to deal with stress and OVERWHELM.

And I am sure it (overwhelm) is a topic you can also relate to.

It is not whether we will experience overwhelm or not.

It is about ‘when’, and then HOW WE DEAL WITH IT.

That is where I will take you.

I am personally feeling overwhelmed about now.

But it is not the minor daily stuff, but the “WTF do I do next?!” sort of stuff.

My Morning Rituals and Weekly Meeting with Me Inc do a great job most of the time, but if stuff builds up, or there are new factors, our ability to cope can reach overflow.

That is what today’s strategy is dealing with.

For me, the overwhelm is the result of: selling our house, building a new house (in a foreign country), doing the money juggling act, managing my current coaching clients (and new clients), helping my first-time authors finish their books, getting coaching programs organised for 2024 (because this year is whizzing by), plus finishing my book and associated parts, then publishing and launching it on 20 November. And a couple of weeks ago I made the decision to have our sausage dog of 16-years put down.

So a bunch of stuff going on, but maybe the book launch is the thing that is probably pushing me over the line, since it is a significant project.

So what to do????

Essentially I need to figure some shit out.

Organise the jigsaw pieces.

But how best to do that…??

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Choice Life Lessons Nutrition Optimum Health Perspective

Wisdom, Discernment and What’s for Breakfast?

You know I am a fan of wisdom.

I am also a fan of discernment, critical-thinking and sensing what is ‘self-evident’.

Having read a book recently that was a deep-dive into the differences between the right and left hemispheres, it is pretty clear that our education systems and societal systems in general favour a left-brain bias (and worldview).

This means being taught what to think (by people supposedly smarter than us) and not being taught ‘how to think.’

Wisdom is about knowing how to think and then applying that knowledge in a conscious way.

And it turns out that the right brain is best for discerning BS, so stretching our minds a little more is definitely in our favour.

Mindfulness practices like meditation help develop the right hemisphere, by expanding our consciousness, and dropping into the interconnection of everything.

Everything is connected (as quantum physics agrees with).

Whereas the left hemisphere is about reductionism, fixation, inflexibility, judgement and making stuff up.

So, having said that, and having created some context for what I want to support you with (becoming wiser) let me get back the topic of “What’s for breakfast?”

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Fear Feeling Life Lessons Negative Emotions Perspective Problem

How to Stop Getting Triggered

One of the primary things I do when working with new clients is have them record when they get TRIGGERED.

This information is gold dust.

Outstanding feedback.

BUT…only if you do something with it.

We all get triggered.

But IT is the wisest among us who learn from it, in order to grow and evolve and to not get triggered (as much or not at all) next time.

Firstly let me define what I mean by ‘Getting Triggered‘.

It is essentially any time where we are reactively taken out of an elevated emotional state, neutral state or homeostasis, and dropped into a survival emotional state. Essentially the amygdala has determined there is some sort of physical threat, so it activates the sympathetic nervous system, and we have a physiological fight, flight or freeze response. This does not include automatic responses to real physical threats.

Sometimes we are ‘positively’ triggered and that is awesome and another great thing to learn from.

Thumbs up and now do more of that.

However, for this article (and your ongoing well-being) I am more interested in the ‘negative‘ triggers, and the bigger the trigger, the more (loving) attention we need to give them.

Examples include: getting triggered by an email, getting triggered while driving on the road, getting triggered by your partner or friends, getting triggered by people wearing face masks while alone on a beach, getting triggered by being told ‘no’, getting triggered by people riding motorbikes through intersections while texting on their phones, etc..

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