There has been a common necessity with my coaching clients over the last few years.
And obviously, the last few years have been among our most disruptive ever.
Regardless of your beliefs or perspective, life has been a little bit wonky.
As a result there are some personal fundamentals that need some work.
And since I am in the process of building a house and farm in Bali, I am inspired by the building process.
Something every builder knows.
It is essentially this:
If you screw up the foundation, it can extremely costly and with a high level of uncertainty.
You might even need to demolish everything and start from scratch.
How does this analogy relate?
It is SOOOOO important, it ought to be a school subject.
“How to build a solid foundation in your life”.
Let’s see what this practically means.
The consequences of an unstable foundation
What might instability in your life – i.e. an unstable foundation – look like?
- Experiencing a feeling of being unsafe or insecure.
- Being highly reactive to external events.
- Being very oversensitive emotionally.
- Life feeling like you or life is ‘all over the place’.
- Having major mood swings.
- A general feeling of instability, like the ground is not stable under you, and you could collapse at any point.
These scenario’s are not uncommon.
They are also not fixed, permanent, or unchangeable.
The principle consequence of not having a stable physical, mental, emotional and spiritual foundation under you, is everything you build is likely to have less stability.
If you don’t have a solid psychological foundation under you, the intimate relationships you may enter into, may not be healthy for you. The professional offers you say ‘yes’ to might not serve you best. The ideas you come up with, might be out of alignment with your values or not appropriate for you.
Without a solid foundation under you, whatever you build, may be at risk of falling down, or causing you emotional harm.
BEFORE YOU BUILD ANYTHING YOU WANT TO LAST OR PERFORM WELL, WORK ON YOUR FOUNDATION.
I see a lot of my clients do a bit of foundation work, but then head off too early (before the concrete has set). Before they are fully stable. And inevitably, they flounder for a bit, and then realise they need to slow down, and focus their attention and energy on building a stable foundation, before they can reach for greatness.
Building a solid and stable FOUNDATION
This is generally the first conversation I have with my clients.
I draw a rectangle on my whiteboard (that looks like the cement foundation of a building) and we talk about the stability of their personal foundation.
Just like a building foundation is enhanced by taking the footings deep enough, having weight evenly displaced, strengthening areas that will be load bearing, and using reinforcing steel to enhance the integrity of the foundation, we need to do the same.
We need to work on our foundation first, before we work on building our relationships, our business, our projects, and anything else that might stretch us.
These are some of the things I recommend, for creating a solid Foundation:
- Create a home-base environment that is grounding, stabilizing and with minimal distractions.
- Establish a solid, stability-enhancing ‘Morning Routine‘.
- Meditate.
- Exercise.
- Drink plenty of “WATER” (2 litres at least, and drinks with water in them don’t count (i.e. coffee or soda drinks)).
- Do the inner work to resolve unprocessed gunk (preferably daily).
- Get external help to do an audit, just like you would bring in a professional to look at your building foundations, before you build anything bigger or higher.
- Practice patience and don’t go off half-cocked, before your foundation is fully established and in a healthy state.
Building a solid and stable foundation is ESSENTIAL and it is not something someone else can do for you. You have to build your foundation. You can obviously get help, but you are the one who will most impact the effectiveness of your foundation; though you are also the one reaping the benefits.
My main message
You will find it much harder to express greatness if you are trying to do so from an unstable foundation.
Sometimes life happens – like an earthquake or the disruption of the last few years – and you need to go back and assess the strength, integrity and appropriateness of the foundation you created in the past.
Your foundation may require a psychological upgrade (or fundamental repairs).
With the right, solid, stable foundation, you can (more safely) reach for the stars in relationships, personal projects, professionally, physical challenges, and whatever else it is you want to tick off in your life.
Step 1: Build a stable Foundation.
Step 2: Reach for the Stars.
My Parting words
We all need to check out our foundations, after the disruption of the last few years.
And some may need more work than others.
But don’t neglect the somewhat un-sexy work of building a stable foundation.
Be it through morning rituals like meditation or even journaling.
With a stable mind, and emotional stability, the world is your canvas to produce something magnificent.
How solid is your Foundation?
Does it need some work?
If so, roll those sleeves up or ask for some help.
Enjoy your day and have a grounded, centered and stable week.
See you next week.
Take care,
Carl
